Aesthetic Yap

It was in the March of the winter I turned seventeen
That I bought those pills I thought I would need
And I wrote a letter to my family
Said it's not your fault
And you've been good to me
It's just lately I've been feeling
Like I don't belong
Like the ground's not mine to walk upon

(---)

So please forgive what I have done
No, you can't stay mad at the setting sun
Cause we all get tired, I mean eventually
There is nothing left to do but sleep

(---)

I wrote this for a baby
Who has yet to be born
My brother's first child
I hope that womb's not too warm
Cause it's cold out here
And it will be quite a shock
To breathe this air
To discover loss
So I'd like to make some changes
Before you arrive
So when your new eyes meet mine
They won't see no lies
Just love
Just love

I will be pure
No, no, I know
I will be pure
Like snow, like gold
Like snow, like gold

(Bright Eyes, No lies, Just love)

The best part of having a brother is being able to actually identify with these lyrics to a larger extent. Not that I've ever bought any kind of pills, except for painkillers. And they don't kill, in the same sense of the word. I'm very fond of them, though.

Went to Joey's tonight. She lives over in Höllviken, or Kämpinge to be exact. I was invited, along with our people from school, to go there and do a bunch of christmasy things, like making smällkarameller (or sprängkarameller as Miko calls them) and drinking glögg and baking ginger snaps. It was nice. Really nice. None of the things I did today are things that I used to do with my family when I was younger, but I still associate them with christmas. Of course. And I did get that christmasy feeling I think I always felt when I was a child. At least I think so, but every time I tried to grasp it it disintegrated, or mutated into a solemn feeling of loneliness.

I wonder if anyone actually bothers to click on my hyperlinks. I know I wouldn't if I were you, but maybe I should try linking to say porn or tubgirl or something. Just for the heck of it.

Anyway, I met Joey's niece Selma today. She's just a baby, her first birthday was last week. Actually, it was her second birthday... wouldn't the day you were born qualify as a birthday? I think it should. Yes. Meeting Selma was the start of this whole No lies, just love-thing we're experiencing today. Babies are nice. Bright Eyes is nice. Speaking of which, I've written my wishlist for christmas:

• Bright Eyes I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning
• Jeff Buckley Grace
• An MP3-player (don't laugh, I wouldn't get an Ipod even if I had been the nicest girl in the world during this year)
• Stella McCartney's perfume
• Socks (size 41)
• Scented candles (flowery scents please!)
• Face wash
• Face toner

And that's about it. Lame? Perhaps. However, considering the fact that I got Sean for my birthday six months ago, I shouldn't ask for too much. I'd be happy with just the top 4 points on my list. Anyone have Santa's adress?