IT'S ALL ABOUT LOWERING

YOUR STANDARDS.

I'm in the middle of finding myself. I never understood that phrase, but it sounds like what I'm doing now. I'm in between everything possible and I'm trying to sort of find out which way to lean. Sounds pretty dramatic but it really isn't.

I used to have a friend called Frida. We were pretty close, especially during the winter when we organized a party together and she came to me for comfort after her relatives had died in the tsunami. Actually, I don't think we were that close. I never really trusted her, that's for sure. Anyway, in stead of writing what was wrong with her I'll just cut to the chase and tell you that we sort of ended our relationship in June this year. It was a big decision and mostly mine, but it felt very good. Also, we didn't "break up" or anything, we just decided to let everything retract to a more primitive relationship. Uh, yeah. We're more like "kompisar" than "vänner" and it doesn't sound too big but it is.

I know Frida through Joey. They're both in my class now, but Frida just started last year after spending one year in Australia. I've known Joey for two years now and she's a very close friend of mine. While me and Frida had the first of our many fights during this spring, I tried discussing this with some of my friends from our class. Kajsa, Martyna, Johanna and Joey that is. I remember thinking that Joey would give me an explanation for Frida's behavior, since they's been friends since they were kids. Turns out, Joey agreed with me on all points and envied me for being able to tell Frida to her face. Apparently, Joey hadn't yet dared to talk to Frida about their friendship. Maybe because of their long relationship or something, but everything just wasn't right. Anyway. Joey had a talk with Frida last week and they've basically done the same thing we did. Pretty impressive. It feels wonderful to know that I don't have to listen to Frida the entire next year, but I have a feeling that this isn't over and done with quite yet. And I'm an optimist.

And check out this picture of me, taken by Lecille in June. In my garden actually, if I'm not mistaken.

Don't I look like the Halle Berry poster?

(actually, this is the mysterious and sexy look I'm working on right now.)